Let's Pretend!

Matt has always loved concerts and plays. Sarah was in quite a few of these events – starting in middle school. We recorded her first play and Matt would watch the video tape over and over (and over and over). He absolutely loved the idea of pretending to be someone else. It is interesting to note that one of the behaviors listed in describing autism is “no pretend play”, but this is just another one of those behaviors that seem to be in place only in the early years – it is not set in stone. The autism brain has a lag-phase, where normal behaviors are put on hold – in Matt’s case it took years to learn to pretend. But, once he began, he never stopped. One of the events important to learning to pretend came in watching Sarah pretend to be someone else, in front of an audience, and the audience laughed! This must have shown Matt that pretending was not only acceptable, it was fun. He watched that video daily – and for years!

Pretending to be someone else became part of his ritual. In playing a video game he could pretend to be in the action along with the animated participants, memorizing dialogue as if he were memorizing the lines of a play. As he grew older he learned to add his own lines - ad lib according to the situation occurring on the video screen. This really took off when Matt became a member of the OM team for Sheffey Elementary. OM – or Odyssey of the Mind – was an academic competition which included putting on skits. Matt found himself a member of a team that pretended.

He loved it. He found the skits to be funny and when Matt found something funny you knew it – his laugh was (and still is) a very deep, heartfelt emotion bubbling up from his very soul and it was (and still is) very contagious. His ability to speak fluently had not yet arrived and he had trouble reciting lines – not that there was any problem with his ability to memorize – only in his actual ability to speak. Matt had difficulty with pronunciation and grammar, and his roles in each skit were usually more active and less talk. He loved it. Not having to speak took away the stress of being different. He never seemed uncomfortable performing to large groups of strangers. This was most likely due to the closeness of his team, his ability to keep focused on them, and his ability to tune-out the rest.

Matt eventually got too old to be in OM and his grammar and pronunciation were still far from perfect, hindering any possibility in being in the plays at the high school level. Yet, Matt continued to pretend with his video games and with his favorite movies. During this time I started teaching - in a different high school. I started taking Matt to see the spring play each year. He loved them! He even video taped the play and gave copies to the cast. Each of the students from the play would meet Matt and shake his hand. That small gesture solidified them into his memory. He felt accepted and – normal. My students have always been very good with Matt.

Matt still pretends. Each video game he plays, he puts himself into the starring role, memorizing dialogue and even adding his own remarks where appropriate. The act of pretending has helped advance his speech. His voice is now clear, his grammar correct. He still has a small stutter when he can’t find just the right word and still uses an “umm” before a long sentence - possibly his way of organizing his thoughts before speaking.

Pretending has also given Matt a way to be normal. He can enter any fictitious world and be “The Man”. He uses the pretend play as a way to practice interactions, hone conversation skills and be someone who is not autistic – even if it is only for a few hours each day.

Pretending. It is a simple behavioral stage that all children go through. For the autistic child, pretending must be learned - just as they learn every other behavior – by practice and observation. After Matt saw his first play - Sarah’s play - he was hooked. The days, months and even years of listening to her play on tape drove us crazy. Yet, now, years and years later I can look back and see the importance of that play. It was a beginning. Matt knew if Sarah could do it that he could do it. He knew it was acceptable and normal. He knew it was fun and entertaining.

Matt’s autism cloud may have hindered his interaction and speech abilities, but his natural instincts showed him the way out from under that cloud. Pretending is definitely one of the wonderfully great methods he used to light his path.